Doing Nothing is Doing Nothing

When does a person finally get fed up with being complacent. I' doing nothing and it is doing nothing for me. I am inspired by so much yet I can't seem to find the capacity to do anything about it. I go through the routine of being a student and it feels so dry at times. I am writing papers and doing mindless homework that is only a time filler. I am sick of being bored with school, being bored with myself. I am not completely apathetic, or at least I hope not. I am recognizing the things in my life that need to turn. I have walked in the garden and ate of its fruit. I want to change not only my way of thought but others as well. I want people to run with freedom. Freedom to create, to ask questions, to seek the truth. It time for me to move out of my comfort zone and expand my life. To grow in love. To express the song, my song, that resides in my spirit. It beacons to be released, to be given as an expression of gratitude.

21st Century American and Opportunity For the Dream

The 21st Century American is hard to define. There is a vast difference between different parts of the country in both culture and opportunity. The U.S. lacks a real sense of cultural identity. What does it really mean to be an American? It is hard to answer because this country was built on the diversity of some many. The history of this nation isn't rooted in any tradition above turkey on Thanksgiving. The typical American feels entitled, and is looking out for themselves above the greater good of all. I do believe that people are more globally aware of what is going on, but it is becoming harder to give and give like we have in the past. The economy sucks and the government is making itself harder to trust. The American of today finds it harder to make ends meet. It sucks for sure but, with unemployment above 10 percent, life is more of a struggle than it once was. Opportunity is available but it is harder to get. If only from a purely numbers perspective, the competition for jobs is greater. There are more jobs going overseas, more people are coming to the states, and the requirements for jobs is increasing. Opportunity itself is not even equal to all. I didn't always believe that or at least I didn't want to believe that but opportunity is not available in the same capacity to all. Anyone can do just about anything is they try, even to the point of death it might seem, but people can do what they want if they work at it. The difference is the starting point. Some people are at a disadvantage from the get go. If a kids growing up in poor Urban America, he will not have the same opportunity or will have to work harder to get them than a kids growing up in upper class white suburbia. The American dream can be had by anyone, but the work put forth to achieve it is not always the same.

Gender Roles

There is no doubt that the U.S. in a male dominate society, or at least a male run society. The government is run by men and most of corporate America is run by men. With that said, there is a definite place for women. Women have become a vital part of the corporate scene. Women bring a different mentality to the way business is done. As for the roles at home, the traditional line is being blurred. Women are going to work while the men stay at home with the children. The tradition of the homemaking woman is no longer an expectation. The idea of a man staying home with the kids would seem like a joke in the 50's, but now it is a part of American life. The roles of the man and the woman are really no different any more. I have never been in a situation where women where paid less but I am sure that sometimes happens. The gender roles are no longer divided like they once were. Honestly, it is hard to write about because I don't see a line between what men and women do. Even the sex roles are no longer defined. There has been a rise in a the awareness and acceptability of homosexuality. So now, sex has become less of a taboo and one cannot be defined by that either. Sure, there is still an underling prejudice toward women at home but it is becoming less and less an issue.

Woman Warrior

I am mixed about Woman Warrior. At times the stories that Kingston Wrote were easy to follow and felt like a real memoir. Other stories like the one about Brave Orchid, were not so easy to follow. I don't know much if anything about Chinese culture and history, so the stories of ghost could be true in some sense. The story of the sitting ghost and the ridding of said ghost was awkward. I feel like the ghost had greater meaning than purely face value, but I failed to see the significance. I believe the reason we read this story was to gain perspective on what it means to be an Asian American and the difference in views that today we hold as Americans. Also to get perspective into what it means to be a woman. The arranged marriages, the fear being left alone, and brutal village people carrying torches with a hatred for adulterous women. Also reading through the chapter of the woman warrior, felt like reading the script for Disney's Mulan. I figure that is an ancient Chinese tale that both the book and the movie have drawn from. The White tigers chapter was probably my favorite. It with the chapter about brave orchid gave a boldness to the women in the book. It was a contrast to the opening of the book that chronicled her aunts suicide. The book claims to be memoirs of a girlhood, but seems like there is a lot of fiction throughout. I liked the fictional elements and I really don't want to get hung up on the fact that it was or wasn't a true memoir. It did bring to light the crap that Asian women deal with. Rape was a big part of what happens to women in that culture. In the book it is mentioned and the effects are still seen today. Sex trafficking continues to be a large problem in the Asian world. The stories in the novel also show the social issues felt by Asian Americans through prejudice and the like. Woman Warrior was much better than Beloved was, and for that I am truly grateful.

Beloved, Give Me "Uncle Tom's Cabin"

Reading Beloved I can see the meaning behind writing. It is a very strong message about the horrors of slavery. The United States was founded upon the principle that all men are created equal, but what really happened was a different story. The U.S. was not the biggest slave nation in the world but surly has made a mark on the history of the world's slave trade. Today we still feel the effects of this, as many people wrote about in their descriptions of discriminatory acts. The book sent a powerful message. I'm not saying that because it won an award, but because of the way it was written. At times I felt I was swimming in a pool jello with the occasional stab of a syringe. With an, "Oh, that's nice, get me the hell outta here." The theme of the book is the effects psychologically that slaves felt. I have been so far removed from slavery that it is had for me to realize the impact that it really made on the people involved and the nation. What we see now in this nation is simply the dregs of the issues that started in the slave era. What I don't understand is why it won the Pulitzer prize. By my previous statements you might wonder why? Yes, it was a powerful message, but it was painful to get through. OK, so your life sucks and your house might be haunted, get the hell out of there. The demons of slavery will chase you anywhere, that is why none of the characters were willing to talk about their past life in Sweet Home. I know that Morrison was sending a message that slavery is more than a crime that once relieved of, is all forgotten. But the story of her killing her children in the barn and the complete exception of Beloved is nonsensical. How did Sethe not question the reasons for Beloved's existence or at least her stay at the house? Perchance I am coming down on this book too hard but it was not a Pulitzer prize winner. Indian Killer had me hanging on every page, while Beloved was laborsome. Give me Uncle Tom's Cabin any day before this desperate mother's love of a fictitious poltergeist. I was really hoping Pauly D would say no to the pussy and kill that braud, but no such luck. Instead, he wants Sethe's baby and it gets really Maury Povich. I liked it for the message it sent but the execution was dreadful. I'm hoping Kingston doesn't leave me with such dissatisfaction.

Acts of Discrimination

When thinking about an act of discrimination, I know that I have been guilty of it. My room ate, Levi, is from Orlando. He has had very different life experiences than me, and I have learned a lot from him. I have never been a raging bigot, but I have come to see the importance of culture within different groups. For Levi, he grew up with many Hispanic friends and that has become a part of who he is. That means he sits in his room, cranks up the salsa music, and yells Spanish gibberish over the top. But there are times when I have crossed the line with him. There are times when I feel I'm joking around about black people or Hispanic people, but he comes from the background where that sort of talk doesn't fly.
I have my worst racial outbursts when I am driving. I think in general, I use my time driving as a time to vent and yell, but I digress. I was driving, on my way home, when three black kids walked out into the street with complete disregard for me. They then proceeded to stand in the road with some 'no big deal' facial expressions. So rolled down the window and yelled some choice words before they got the hell out of the road. But the worst part is I began to think that is just like a group of black kids. They don't give a damn and I hate them. I realized that what I was pissed about was turning into a racial rant. It shouldn't have mattered that they were black but I still made issue of it.
It has be a learning experience coming from my small middle America school, with only white students. I never hated anyone but I have grown to see that I was compromising. I think it is fine to point out stereotypes in the right setting, but not to allow those to become a reality in your thoughts and actions. I love Dave Chappelle for that very reason. He makes fun of every racial or ethnic group, but does it in a manner that doesn't cause a hatred. And maybe I'm wrong, and no one should ever point out stereotypes. That all people should be held to the same standard and accountability.

Indian Killer: The Struggle of Existance

Sherman Alexie's Indian Killer was an amazing book. His ability to develop characters and use of flashbacks made the book engaging throughout. Alexie uses the murders as a way to stir up the underling racial tensions between Native Americans and the 'white man.' In an act as simple as naming the serial murderer, the Indian killer, the city of Seattle was torn into two groups with fear being the one shared emotion. For me, the most telling parts of the book were the chapters John imagined his life on the reservation. He looked at what his life would be like if he had grown up as a real Indian. The reservation is a place of love and acceptance that he didn't feel in his life. This is something that all people do, imagine their lives as it could have been. What would life be like if the choices made in our life were made different? This becomes John's obsession, one that he can only deal with by his lust for the blood of the one who caused him the pain in life. John undoubtedly had some mental instability. He was constantly hearing music and saw father Duncan who had disappeared years before. This mental handicap probably played into his pain, but John had no way of coping with it.
This idea is also seen in Marie. On page 61, the narrator reveals that Marie feels her life is a constant struggle. As she confronts her teacher, she does it out of necessity. Struggle is her existence. This is what I believe is the theme of the novel. It is certainly about the racial hatred of the first nations people, but more than that, it is the struggle of the Native Americans. Marie's character is the most outspoken Indian in the book. She knows her history and believes in the Native American culture. She stands up to her professors, organizes powwows, and feeds the homeless Indians. For her, Alexie writes, "For Marie, being Indian was mostly about survival, and she'd been fighting so hard for her survival." This struggle for survival is effected every Indian in the story, from the homeless who had nothing, to John who was raised by a family that had everything. Even Reggie was trying to survive. He was beat by his father at a young age, and when he attended the University of Washington, his teacher broke the trust they shared. Reggie was the most promising student in Dr. Mather's class. When Dr. Mather's found the tapes of the Indian stories, Reggie asked him to destroy them. And then the falling out happened, where again Reggie was back being a ten year old boy, simply surviving.
Who the killer is doesn't really matter. It could be any Indian. It could have been in the cast of characters Alexie introduces, or more likely in my mind, some Indian the reader never meets. The killer's identity is not ultimately important, what is important is the genocide of the Native people and the elimination of their culture. The struggle to stay Indian, to understand what it means to be Indian.